If you’re constantly being harsh on yourself, ignoring your qualities, disbelieving those who appreciate you, having people disrespect you and taking you for granted, feeling anxiety and emotional turmoil, stuck in wrong relationships with wrong people, and experiencing what you really don’t want in your life, it clearly shows that you have already developed a low self esteem.
In most simple words, self esteem is self judgment.
It means how much you value, appreciate, approve of, respect, like and love yourself.
Your self esteem is your own attitude towards yourself.
The little things you do and feel, and the choices you make speak volumes about your self esteem.
Let me confess. I have been in your shoes for too long.
When I look back, my past life scares me.
My low self esteem had almost ruined my life, and I had lost it all just in each area of my life.
Not too long ago, I was showing every single sign of low self esteem that I am sharing here with you.
And it was much more painful than I could ever express.
Before I go on to give you the most common warning signs of poor self esteem, let’s first see how your most important life areas get affected when you live with too low a self esteem.
Some Direct Effects of Low Self Esteem
Your Health and Emotions:
You would most often experience health issues, high stress and anxiety levels, and often find yourself in emotional turmoil.
Your Career:
You are much likely to attract and stay stuck in low paying jobs, non-appreciative bosses, colleagues, and clients.
You won’t be (enough) valued, appreciated or taken seriously, despite all the hard work and effort.
Your Relationships:
People with low self esteem usually find themselves amidst of wrong people and abusive relationships, and remain trapped for until a lifetime.
You’re highly likely to marry or date wrong partner(s). Your spouse, family and friends will take you for a toss.
Your Finances:
Most usually, money will be hard to catch.
And what you earn will never be enough to pay your bills, and fund the lifestyle you want to create for yourself, and those dependent on you.
Let’s now see the most common Signs of a Low Self Esteem
1. You feel unworthy around people
Everyone around looks so much superior to you, and you feel that you don’t amount to anything. You just want to hide yourself.
2. You get embarrassed when someone gives you a compliment
How do you feel when someone says a nice thing about you? Do you graciously accept it and feel good about it?
Or you feel embarrassed? If you do, then you’re showing a sign of low self esteem.
3. You don’t like your reflection in the mirror
You don’t like your own reflection in the mirror, and say nasty things to yourself; e.g. “I a mess”, “I look ugly”, “I wish I was slimmer”, “I am stupid” or something similar.
For years I hated the person who stared me back in my mirror – myself. Whenever I looked into the mirror, it made me feel uncomfortable. And I used to avoid looking into it.
4. You avoid the company of smarter people
You seek the company of those who you think are less smarter than you. And you try to uphold your importance to these people.
5. You try to hide yourself in social settings
In the first place, you prefer to avoid a social gathering where you’re likely to see ‘smarter than you’ people.
But if you really have to, you would try to hide in a corner with a few ones you know well, or you feel superior to.
6. You rarely try anything you’ve not done before
Trying a new thing looks like a guaranteed failure. So, you don’t want to take a chance.
7. You ceaselessly compare yourself with others
You put yourself in comparison with just everyone you come across.
8. You most often buy and use cheap things
Even when you have enough money to spend on nice pricey things, you most often find yourself picking stuff with the lowest price tag.
You are convinced that you don’t deserve great and expensive stuff.
9. You feel jealous when you hear someone praising someone else
Your hearts aches when you hear someone admiring someone else, and you feel offended. You begin thinking or talking about their faults and weaknesses.
10. You’re too sensitive to constructive feedback
Any kind of criticism or even constructive feedback offends you. And you either behave defensive or go hide in your shell feeling worse about yourself.
Sometimes, you even cut connection with the giver.
11. You apologise a lot
You feel apologetic about almost everything. “I am sorry” seems to be your favourite line.
I was an apology addict. I would say sorry for almost every thing. You name it.
I would make an apology for things like taking up space, expressing a different opinion, calling someone, taking someone’s time, or even someone else bumping into me
12. You’re a people pleaser
You try hard to please everyone just to hear a few words of praise (which you are actually not going to believe anyway).
You buy excessive gifts, and do difficult things just to feel wanted, needed, or admired.
13. You feel indecisive, and don’t stick to your decisions
When it comes to making even small choices, your mind goes blank.
You feel indecisive about what to wear, where to eat, which movie to watch, and so forth.
14. You put yourself last
Everyone else is more important than you, and you usually settle for what others decide or choose for you. You neglect yourself, and never feel the need to develop or nurture you physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually.
So, are you showing any or more of these warning signs of low self esteem? What are you going to do about raising your levels of self esteem, and sense of self worth?
I would Love to have your views shared in the comments.
The Ultimate Self-Care:
A Simple Plan to Boost Your Well Being, Self Esteem and Confidence
